James Knapp, Author at HARDTIMES

5 Lifehacks That Don’t Work but Might Help Distract You From Your Dumb, Broken Life for Like Twenty Minutes

January 4, 2022

We all know life is full of little annoyances that only exist to make things a little more difficult. Not…

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Punk Show Upcharges On Ticket Price For Veterans

January 4, 2022

IOWA CITY, Iowa — Promoters at a recent local show agreed that they would bump the door fee up three…

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Aging Punk Already Maxed Out Allotted Three New Bands Per Year He’s Able to Listen To

January 2, 2022

PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Forty-year-old punk Dave Taverston reportedly hit his limit for new music he is physically and psychologically capable…

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Practical Anarcho-Punk Figures They’ll Start by Overthrowing Local Government First and Then Work Their Way Up

December 31, 2021

WORCESTER, Mass. — Punk and self-described “downfall of the establishment” Lyle Ponsinon recently made the decision to focus on ensuring…

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5 Christmas Traditions Your New Partner’s Family Does Every Year That Are Gonna Be Real Fucking Weird for You

December 23, 2021

So, it’s your first Christmas as a couple and your partner’s family insists you both come out for the holidays.…

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We Smoked Pot in New Jersey and the Front Bottoms Sued Us for Copyright Infringement

December 12, 2021

Recently, we took a trek to New Jersey to take in the food, culture, and historic sights of... alright, fine,…

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Opinion: If I Got Pulled Over Right Now I’m Pretty Sure I Could Sex My Way Out of It

November 30, 2021

Okay, let’s just access the situation here. I’ve had thirty beers, I do not know where my license is, this…

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11 Celebrities Who Committed Crimes You Probably Never Heard About

November 27, 2021

Famous people often receive special treatment as a result of their celebrity status. But you might be surprised to learn…

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Unvaccinated, Immunocompromised, Septuagenarian Grandparents Can’t Believe You’re Using Same Excuse as Last Year to Avoid Coming to Thanksgiving

November 25, 2021

SIOUX FALLS, S.D. — News that you will not be attending Thanksgiving dinner this year over ongoing concerns surrounding the…

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House Show Sound Guy Has No Idea What He’s Doing There Either

November 17, 2021

DULUTH, Minn. — Professional sound technician Greg Thornton released an exasperated and rambling statement confirming that he also doesn’t understand…

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