We Debunk Our Wife’s Claim That She’s “Leaving Us” Because We’ve Become a “Conspiracy Weirdo”
Well apparently it’s “where we go one, we go alone” for me. Somehow, while my back was turned, my wife…
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Dan Rice — Page 43
626 stories found
Opinion: Oh, So When I Said “Frankenstein” and Not “the Monster” You Had No Idea What I Was Talking About
Oh my god. I am so sorry. You are right, of course! The character I am describing is in fact…
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Amazing! This Horror-Themed Cake Looks Just Like a Dead Body and Tastes Like Blood and Raw Meat
It’s October again and, in the culinary world, that means horror-themed confections! It is the season of sugar, after all.…
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We Said Candyman 5 Times in the Mirror and Tony Todd Showed up and I Guess He Was in the Middle of Something Because He’s Pissed
With Halloween right around the corner, The Hard Times decided now would be a fun time to investigate some spooky…
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Heartbreaking: This Turtle and Dog Were Best Friends Until the Turtle Fucked the Dogs Wife
A few months back we brought you the story of Herman the turtle and Chase the beagle, two animals that…
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Nation Tests Positive for Hope
AMERICA — An overwhelming majority of rational Americans announced they were suddenly infected with hope, an emotion thought to be…
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Opinion: How Could Trump Die From COVID When He’s So Muscular in This Cartoon?
My president likes his soldiers “not captured.” Well, I like my presidents “not dead.” And I like Trump, so it’s…
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An Open Letter To the Developers of That Video Game Who Promised I Wouldn’t Last More Than 2 Minutes Before Busting
Dear Smut Developers, I am writing in regards to an ad for your product that I saw while trying to…
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We Look Back on Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” and Convince Ourselves He Did All That Stuff After That
At The Hard Times, we periodically like to pay homage to the most iconic albums of all time. So with…
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We Infiltrated an Antifa Training Camp and Accidentally Signed up for an LGBTQ Open Mic
According to our president, Antifa is the greatest threat facing America today, and yet so little is known about them.…
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