SAN DIEGO — Local procrastinator Rupa Patel claims she’s never more productive around the house than when she’s on tight deadlines at the office with…
Physicists say energy doesn’t die, it just changes form, but Ada Williams, an administrative assistant at Abbott Healthcare, proves that when energy doesn’t die, it…
PHILADELPHIA – Local Burnout John Parker admitted he wasn’t surprised to receive an exclusive text from his dad today offering a job that he should…
OKLAHOMA CITY — Employees at a local accounting firm are reportedly confounded by a recent hire who is simultaneously the worst co-worker they’ve ever had…
DURANGO, Colo. – Employees at a local insurance office were granted permission to arrive to work baked out of their goddamn gourds and reeking of…
WHEELING, W. Va. — Unemployed hardcore punk singer Lyle “Coccyx” Plant is seeking employment with a resume consisting solely of fistfights and crew battles in…
GALLATIN, Tenn. — Aging Punk and Volunteer Insurance Co. shift supervisor, Braden Niles, entered his fourteenth year of trying to get the entire office to…
Are you feeling tired? Is your body failing you in strange ways? If you’re looking for the secret to youth and vitality, you’ve come to…
If you’ve got a job that you go to at least five days a week and have a different pair of pants for each day,…
HARTFORD, Conn. — Beleaguered local drummer Sadie Plemmons assigned all future ride cymbal playing to a recently-hired sous-drummer in order to help with her percussion…
NEW HAVEN, Conn. — Maryanne del Fuego was admitted to the hospital for what turned out to be a panic attack caused by a densely…
BELMAR, N.J. — The partial remains of self-proclaimed Weezer fanatic, Lance Figaro, were found washed up on the beach after it was suspected he was…
SOUTH BEND, Ind. – Rumors of sexual tension between Martin’s Super Market employees Jordan Williams and Jackie Martinez were determined to be completely one-sided, nosy…
SYRACUSE, N.Y. — Local punk and administrative assistant Ross Taylor celebrated fifteen years at a job that he claims he only really keeps because of…
PHILADELPHIA — Local punk and office employee Devon Smith successfully hid his tattoos at work by carrying around a huge Boston fern everywhere he goes…