PORTLAND, Ore. — White progressive voters across the country announced they were excited by how many different races, genders, and ethnicities they can blame for…
WEST CHESTER, Penn. — Local Trump supporter Stephen Hall confirmed that he is happy about Trump’s win, but is a “little disappointed” that he won’t…
DAYTON, Ohio — Members of Hawthorne Heights announced they would be pivoting their merch strategy at shows in their home state following a vote to…
NORWELL, Mass. — Lifelong Democrat and self-proclaimed liberal activist Andy O’Hare added his name to a petition to build more affordable housing while clarifying the…
AUSTIN, Texas — Republican lawmakers in Texas finally passed a controversial voter suppression bill along party lines which is set to take the right to…
NEW YORK — Undecided voter Tom O’Reilly is still not sure if any of his top candidates in the city’s upcoming mayoral election are the…
ATLANTA — Quasi-political punk Aaron Scovell convinced himself yesterday that, if he had a job and was registered, his theoretical “douchenozzle boss” wouldn’t let him…
STEVENS POINT, Wisc. — Undecided voters across the U.S. are racking their brains this week trying to decide whether to burn crosses or simply nail…
SHEBOYGAN, Ill. — The nation’s radical “alt-center” is aggressively going about their normal day today without interruptions, according to reports from HR departments around the…
C leveland, Ohio — As Republican presidential hopefuls prepare for what is sure to be an entertaining debate tonight, progressive senator Bernie Sanders sits comfortably…