Oh man, have you seen my Cybertruck? It’s so fucking sick, dude. Just look at it. It’s like something straight out of a 1980s dystopian…
SAN MATEO, Calif. – President-elect Donald Trump announced via Truth Social his intention to remove “any and all” federal protections for the near-extinct Aquabats. “It’s…
PALM BEACH, Fla. — The recently reelected Donald Trump announced that he was most excited to return to the White House in order to locate…
It’s an age-old question—if you had a time machine, would you go back in time and kill baby Hitler? To me, it was always a…
WASHINGTON — House minority leader and top Democrat Hakeem Jeffries asked Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu if they are “still friends” following Donald Trump’s presidential…
The results of this year’s presidential election will forever stand as a moment in which America, for the second time, looked in the mirror and…
As the inauguration looms closer, Trump’s preliminary cabinet picks continue to stir controversy. Many view choices like RFK, Linda McMahon and noted TV quack Dr.…
TALLAHASSEE, Fla. — Former Florida representative Matt Gaetz informed his girlfriend Valentina he will be able to go to her 15th birthday party after ending…
WASHINGTON — The world’s richest man Elon Musk and President-elect Donald Trump are reportedly closer than ever after finding common ground while discussing which of…
PORTLAND, Ore. — White progressive voters across the country announced they were excited by how many different races, genders, and ethnicities they can blame for…
WASHINGTON — Vice President-elect J.D. Vance made history earlier this week when he became the first person to hold the office who is extremely unsettling…
WASHINGTON — Members of the Kamala Harris campaign admit they were deeply troubled by the complete lack of dead people voting in this year’s election,…
WASHINGTON — The leaders of the Democratic National Committee announced they plan to learn absolutely nothing from their embarrassing loss to President-elect Donald Trump, multiple…
WEST CHESTER, Penn. — Local Trump supporter Stephen Hall confirmed that he is happy about Trump’s win, but is a “little disappointed” that he won’t…
BINGHAMTON, N.Y. – Local World War II enthusiast Edward Spencer says he is looking forward to witnessing the rise of fascism unfold in real-time, horrified…