A fifty-two percent tax. I can’t get that figure out of my head. Fifty-two percent. That’s almost half my income. You see, I still believe…
WASHINGTON — Democratic Presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders accidentally told former Vice President Joe Biden “nice set” after tonight’s democratic debate, an audio clip released by…
Homeless people won’t be getting any pocket change from me. I’m not gonna give these people my hard-earned money just so they can spend it…
SOUTH BEND, Ind. — Mayor Pete Buttigieg held a press conference today to announce the end of his presidential campaign after realizing he was not…
These liberals get upset over every little thing, even sucking dick. Everyone knows that sex shouldn’t be a safe space. I am a proud, red…
IRVINE,Calif. — Local punk Jenny Stoever is hoping against all hope that her father Ted Stoever’s ardent support of President Trump is just a passing…
NINTH CIRCLE OF HELL — Denizens of the underworld are welcoming significant infrastructure improvements over the next few weeks as the newest arrival, billionaire David…
I’ve always thought of myself as a pretty positive guy. A bird craps in my eyes, I’m like, “At least I have another eye.” When…
This fucking guy. Our so called “president” (aka “45” because I refuse to even say Donald Trump’s name) is a complete fucking idiot that we…
VLADIVOSTOK, Russia — @DNCSorosTracker, one of the more successful Russian Twitter bots created to influence American elections, announced plans today to pursue a comedy career…
My moral fiber and ethical egoism inform my political leanings. And normally I don’t like to give chicks positive attention, but Ayn Rand can totally…
NEW YORK — Andrew “W.K.” Wilkes-Krier will run for the U.S. presidency in 2020 as a representative of all parties, his campaign strategist confirmed earlier…