PORTLAND, Ore. — Local marketing associate and Black person Imani Phillips found yesterday that her iPhone X’s storage is almost entirely full of overly supportive…
PHILADELPHIA — Local punk band Bait and Snitch admitted today that they are really now more of a punk Dungeons and Dragons group now after…
Like most Americans, I grew up watching “The Sopranos.” My whole family would gather around the TV to see what kind of mob related shenanigans…
LOUISVILLE, Ky. — Ofc. Travis McHone opened fire on several guests gathered at his home last night for a surprise party in his honor, leaving…
SALT LAKE CITY — Barista and local punk Miranda Byers is celebrating her additional shift at Baxter’s Garden today with a splurge purchase of the…
KEENE, N.H. — Local crystal healer and tarot card reader Elizabeth Stuart plans to donate her body to pseudoscience upon her passing, friends and spiritual…
WASHINGTON — Representatives for the popular NFL team based in Washington, D.C. claimed today that they only used their long-standing team nickname as a strategy…
ATLANTA — The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention urged Americans today to “Shut the fuck up for one goddamn second while we’re trying to…
VAN NUYS, Calif. — Celebrated actress and seemingly constant indie cinema presence Chloe Sevigny was seen yesterday hanging around the set of upcoming film “The…
AUSTIN, Texas — Local ex-boyfriend Sergio Matthews offered a convincing argument as to why he doesn’t need therapy by pacing around his girlfriend Mallory Speers’…
LOS ANGELES — Three members of local punk quartet The Herniated Dicks defied Los Angeles’ stringent coronavirus quarantine guidelines to meet up and rag on…
BOISE, Idaho — Local bored woman Mona Trevino has quietly re-followed all of the messy, oversharing friends on Facebook she previously unfollowed after exhausting every…
SACRAMENTO — Local band Meerkat Infanticide has asked Die Society, the headliners of today’s PUNKDEMIK streamed benefit show, to allow them to use their Zoom…
SEATTLE — A visibly nervous group of Democratic leaders held a closed door meeting today to discuss possible ways to ask mega-corporation Amazon to chip…
HEAVEN — God, the almighty creator of Heaven and Earth, can not find a single reason to refuse recently-deceased straight edge kid Randy Larrett’s entry…