MISSOULA, Mont. — Real-deal, bloodsucking vampire Count Adhemar Chauve-Souris was vehemently dismissed as a poser today by mall goths he was recruiting for his gaggle…
BOSTON — Philosophy major Patrick Cartelli returned yesterday from three months studying abroad in London with several new mannerisms, including an insistence on spelling “poser”…
BERKELEY, Calif. — Local punk Leo Picado had a portion of his scene cred transplanted yesterday in an emergency procedure to his little brother, Danny…
TORRANCE, Calif. — Longtime punk and father Al Diaz thoroughly interrogated his teenage daughter’s new boyfriend last night about which five Black Flag songs are…
GREEN BAY, Wis. — Local poser Adam Luis-Meyers narrowly reached the end moments ago of a two-hour long conversation about an album he’s never actually…
ANN ARBOR, Mich. — Liza Epperson realized yesterday that her new girlfriend, who allegedly described herself as “emo” in her Tinder bio, more closely resembles…
SANTA CLARA, Calif. — Local PacSun employee Patrick “Pat” Graham could not solve a captcha test Tuesday afternoon that asked him to click “every real…
ATLANTA — Punk couple Adrian Brooks and Vivian Morgan will try to spice up their love life for Valentine’s Day with some mutual poser play…
Excuse me? What did you say?? How DARE you. “Sheeple” is an offensive term. You don’t get to say it. Us sheeple are a proud…
OFucking Garfield, man… he’s got his face all over T-shirts and TV and posters telling me to read. What a poser. He acts like he…
It was 2012 and the Sacramento digital hardcore noise rap group Death Grips had just released their underground hit album, No Love Deep Web, which…
Mark was one hell of a guy. He was the kind of guy you could come to in times of need, in times of celebration,…
BOSTON — Boston Symphony Orchestra patrons were dismayed last night when a “complete poser” in attendance clapped after the first movement of Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony,…
Look, maybe I don’t dress like it anymore, or go to shows often (or ever), but that doesn’t mean I’m not punk anymore. I’m still…
PHILADELPHIA — Local dog Scraps was completely unable to answer basic trivia questions yesterday about the seminal horror-punk band Misfits, despite wearing the band’s merchandise…