Nicholai Roscoe
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BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Friends of Terence Hart report today that his knack for ruining parties with his alcoholism has transitioned…
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Cory Cousins
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LAFAYETTE, La. — Local guitarist and misanthrope Jeremy Waggoner joined his friend’s band Punted Child earlier this month to avoid…
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Patrick Coyne
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CHICAGO — Polyamorous man John Castenda gallantly put both of his girlfriends on his shoulders at the Rainy Days Music…
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Shea Strauss
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TORONTO — 29-year-old Jazmyn Elliot thought she was falling in love yesterday until she realized she was instead aroused simply…
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Dan Rice
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NEW YORK — Comedy Central announced the cancelation of “Straight Edge History” last night immediately after it’s inaugural episode aired,…
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Ted Pillow
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MILWAUKEE — Local punk Doug Reece is surprised and deeply troubled that he has lived long enough for his metabolism…
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John Danek
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SALT LAKE CITY — Your mom just wanted to let you know today that a single, 22-year-old nurse just started…
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Rose Vineshank
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BALTIMORE — Local frontman Dave Kuenen of hardcore band Hammer & Nail is under scrutiny today for allegedly cheating on…
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Lauren Lavín
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JACKSONVILLE, Fla. — Old-school punk and the woman you call “Grandma,” Ophelia “Snotcock” Dillon, noticed you no longer come by…
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Lauren Lavín
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LONG BEACH, Calif. — A controversial report released by The Center for Technology today concluded that “probably like 90%” of…
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