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Guitar Center Employee Cuts Fresh Strap From Rotating Spit

Guitar Center Employee Cuts Fresh Strap From Rotating Spit

By Jonah Nink

CHICAGO — Local Guitar Center employee Bridget Wolf carefully cut a fresh guitar strap from a rotating spit before serving it to an eager customer…

Four Hour Description of Every PA System in Music Store Ends in Musician Buying Cheapest Option

Four Hour Description of Every PA System in Music Store Ends in Musician Buying Cheapest Option

By Peter Woods

OMAHA, Neb. — Local guitarist Sebastian Melendez purchases the most inexpensive PA at his regular music equipment store following a detailed, four-hour description of every…

Guitar Center Employee Thinks You Just Might Be Good Enough to Handle Their Most Expensive Guitar

Guitar Center Employee Thinks You Just Might Be Good Enough to Handle Their Most Expensive Guitar

By Camden Brazile

SAINT LOUIS — Local Guitar Center sales associate Frank Helms stunned colleagues after discovering you in the Fender section of the store and announcing that…

“I Can Fix Him,” Says Woman Who Is Worse

breakup, still counts, dating

“I Can Fix Him,” Says Woman Who Is Worse

By Freelancer

VAN NUYS, Calif. — Local nursing student Jade Ng divulged to close friends at a bar yesterday her plans to “fix” her Hinge match, local…

Guitar Store Manager Has Horrific NAMM Flashback

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Guitar Store Manager Has Horrific NAMM Flashback

By John Danek

LAS VEGAS — Guitar Zone manager Ian Potts experienced a sudden onset of post-traumatic stress disorder caused by hearing a perfect cacophony of loud, amateur…

If Smashing Your Instrument Is So Cool, How Come Guitar Center Says I Owe Them $17,500?

If Smashing Your Instrument Is So Cool, How Come Guitar Center Says I Owe Them $17,500?

By Ella Gale

This isn’t the dark ages. Women rock out. We play guitars. As Phoebe Bridgers demonstrated on SNL, sometimes we rock so hard that we smash…

Lowe’s Manager Sick of Slipknot Percussionist Testing Garbage Cans, Never Buying One

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Lowe’s Manager Sick of Slipknot Percussionist Testing Garbage Cans, Never Buying One

By John Danek

DES MOINES, Iowa — Local Lowe’s manager Darrell Winchester removed Slipknot percussionist Shawn “Clown” Crahan from the store again last week after he spent hours…

We Rank These 5 Guitar Pickups Despite the Fact That They Sound Goddamned Identical

We Rank These 5 Guitar Pickups Despite the Fact That They Sound Goddamned Identical

By John Danek

We here at The Hard Times love guitar players! Sure, we might rag on them from time to time because they never practice, they’re always…

Amazing Guitar Center Coupon Gets Woman 15% Off Anything Except Products By A Designs, ADAM Audio, Aguilar, Allen & Heath, Alvarez, Ampeg, Antelope Audio, Apogee, Apple, Arturia, Ashdown, Ashly Audio, Avantone, Avid, BAE, Beetronics FX, Blackstar, Bose, Boss, Burl Audio, Caparison Guitars, Catalinbread, Chapman, Crate, Cusack Music, D.W. Fearn, Dangerous Music, Dean Markley, Duesenberg USA, Earthquaker Devices, Earthworks, Electro-Harmonix, Elysia, Empress Effects, Epiphone, Ernie Ball Music Man, EVH, Fender, Fender Custom Shop, Focal, Focusrite, Fostex, Friedman, Fulltone, Fulltone Custom Shop, Gallien-Krueger, Gibson, Gibson Custom, Golden Age Project, GoPro, Heritage Audio, ISP Technologies, JHS Pedals, Keeley, Kemper, Korg, Kurzweil, Kush Audio, LaChapell Audio, Lâg Guitars, Lewitt Audio Microphones, Lindell Audio, Mackie, Manley, Meinl, Metric Halo, Millennia, Milkman Sound, Mojave Audio, Moog, MOTU, Native Instruments, Neumann, Nord, Novation, Orange Amplifiers, Pettyjohn Electronics, Phoenix Audio, PRS, Radial Engineering, Randall, Rane, Reloop, Reverend, RME, Rockett Pedals, Roland, Royer, Ruach Music, se Electronics, Seqential, Serato, Shure, Slate Digital, Slate Pro Audio, Slate Media Technology, Softube, Soundbrenner, Source Audio, Squier, Steven Slate Drums, Studiologic, Suzuki, Taylor, Teenage Engineering, Telefunken, Teletronix, Toft Audio Designs, Tube-Tech, Voodoo Lab, Vox, Walrus Audio, Wampler, Warm Audio, Westone, Xotic Effects, Yamaha, ZT, Zvex

guitar, center, coupon, black friday

Amazing Guitar Center Coupon Gets Woman 15% Off Anything Except Products By A Designs, ADAM Audio, Aguilar, Allen & Heath, Alvarez, Ampeg, Antelope Audio, Apogee, Apple, Arturia, Ashdown, Ashly Audio, Avantone, Avid, BAE, Beetronics FX, Blackstar, Bose, Boss, Burl Audio, Caparison Guitars, Catalinbread, Chapman, Crate, Cusack Music, D.W. Fearn, Dangerous Music, Dean Markley, Duesenberg USA, Earthquaker Devices, Earthworks, Electro-Harmonix, Elysia, Empress Effects, Epiphone, Ernie Ball Music Man, EVH, Fender, Fender Custom Shop, Focal, Focusrite, Fostex, Friedman, Fulltone, Fulltone Custom Shop, Gallien-Krueger, Gibson, Gibson Custom, Golden Age Project, GoPro, Heritage Audio, ISP Technologies, JHS Pedals, Keeley, Kemper, Korg, Kurzweil, Kush Audio, LaChapell Audio, Lâg Guitars, Lewitt Audio Microphones, Lindell Audio, Mackie, Manley, Meinl, Metric Halo, Millennia, Milkman Sound, Mojave Audio, Moog, MOTU, Native Instruments, Neumann, Nord, Novation, Orange Amplifiers, Pettyjohn Electronics, Phoenix Audio, PRS, Radial Engineering, Randall, Rane, Reloop, Reverend, RME, Rockett Pedals, Roland, Royer, Ruach Music, se Electronics, Seqential, Serato, Shure, Slate Digital, Slate Pro Audio, Slate Media Technology, Softube, Soundbrenner, Source Audio, Squier, Steven Slate Drums, Studiologic, Suzuki, Taylor, Teenage Engineering, Telefunken, Teletronix, Toft Audio Designs, Tube-Tech, Voodoo Lab, Vox, Walrus Audio, Wampler, Warm Audio, Westone, Xotic Effects, Yamaha, ZT, Zvex

By Jordan Breeding

WESTLAKE VILLAGE, Calif. — Local guitarist Rochelle Yearwood received an “amazing” coupon this morning, giving her 15% off any product at Guitar Center as long…

New Guitar Pedal Purchase Mostly Based On Cool Name

guitar, pedal, cool, name

New Guitar Pedal Purchase Mostly Based On Cool Name

By Jordan Breeding

CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. — Local guitarist Joel Svensson admitted yesterday that he bought the recently released JHS OrcGrinder pedal primarily based on its cool name and…

Guitar Center Employee Drags Unsold Gear out to Dumpster at End of Day

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Guitar Center Employee Drags Unsold Gear out to Dumpster at End of Day

By Sari Beliak

PHILADELPHIA — Guitar Center employee Henry Stiltz dragged another day’s worth of unsold gear to the dumpster at the end of his shift Tuesday, according…

Woman Calls Guitar Center in Search of Missing Father

Woman Calls Guitar Center in Search of Missing Father

By Freelancer

WHITE PLAINS, N.Y. — Local woman Eloise Mandeel called Guitar Center this morning in hopes that an employee would tell her the whereabouts of her…

New “Female Section” of Guitar Center Filled With Only Basses

guitar center, bass, female

New “Female Section” of Guitar Center Filled With Only Basses

By Anna Walsh

SAN ANTONIO — Local Guitar Center shoppers found today an entirely new section at the store labeled the “Female Section,” which was filled only with…

Poetic Justice: This Guitar Center Employee Just Sat in My House and Played With a Blender Then Left

Poetic Justice: This Guitar Center Employee Just Sat in My House and Played With a Blender Then Left

By Jonah Nink

I wish I could take it back. I wish I had never set foot into that Guitar Center just before close and played guitar until…

Dude at Guitar Center Going to Keep Playing Pavement Song Until Someone Recognizes It

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Dude at Guitar Center Going to Keep Playing Pavement Song Until Someone Recognizes It

By Louie Aronowitz

PARAMUS, N.J. — Musician Dan Beck has been repeatedly playing the same part of the Pavement song “Silence Kid” in a local Guitar Center throughout…