STARBASE, Texas — A contractor working on Elon Musk’s new Texas mega-mansion revealed that every book on the billionaire’s shelf was just a false lever…
HOBOKEN, N.J. – WWE fan and local embarrassment, Connor Duncan, reportedly made preparations to save his liver during WrestleMania this weekend by pre-booking an emergency…
Ever since I was a little boy I’ve wanted to be the frontman of a world-famous group like The Beatles or Less Than Jake. Well…
“Game of Thrones:” the acclaimed HBO fantasy-drama that proved incontrovertibly that Americans will watch literally anything if you cram enough tits and butts in front…
CLAREMONT, Calif. — University student Lisa Dempsey discovered the latter half of her boyfriend’s copy of David Foster Wallace’s titanic novel “Infinite Jest” to be…
WINNIPEG, Manitoba — WheatGrain Books in downtown Winnipeg continues to worry small business owners in the area due to the fact it’s easily the biggest…
NORWELL, Mass. — Local punk Andy Walsh was shocked to discover that a coffee table book featuring various Russian prison tattoos randomly appeared on his…
KINGSTON, Jamaica — Reggae singer and exonerated philanderer Shaggy released a tell-all book recently titled “If It Was Me, Here’s How It Happened,” in response…
ALBANY, N.Y. — Local metalcore band The Demise of Saturn asked scumbag show promoter Steve “Froggy” Fordham to abandon traditional currency and begin ripping them…
LOS ANGELES — 40-year-old IT worker Shane Bryce realized yesterday that he can’t imagine a time in his life where reading an entire book would…
BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — Local Pantera fan Blane Butts referred to another customer at Ingles Supermarket as an “intellectual” yesterday in an apparent attempt to insult…
CHICAGO — Oprah Winfrey shocked the gaming and literary worlds today by announcing that the newest entry in her long running tastemaking book club would…
SAN FRANCISCO — A Novel Experience Bookstore owner Dale Severen was deemed “totally not legit” yesterday for lacking a dynamic selection of ancient texts and…
OXFORD, England — Devoted fans of Stephen King’s The Dark Tower series have hypothesized that the multiverse contained in the story’s lore would mean that…
CHARLESTON, S.C. — Horrified readers across the nation are reporting highly anticipated fantasy novel Obelisk of Dawn is packed with awful songs. “Sing for the…