ABERDEEN, Wash. — Local bald man Louis Grayson woke up in disarray after it was clear he was having another bad skull day, confirmed sources…
INDIANAPOLIS — 38-year-old nu metal fan Bryce Spiller went to extreme lengths to maintain his soul patch after deciding to comb over his thinning facial…
ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. — Wunderkind nine-year-old magician Bucky Hancock wowed a crowd of children and parents at his sister Allison’s birthday party in the Altura Park…
CLACKAMAS, Ore. — Local Guitar Center employee Teddy Burns was informed he would be relegated to the store’s desolate lighting department due to the fact…
BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — Local man James Bo finally fulfilled his lifelong dream of growing out his hair last month, only to discover it happened to…
MADISON, Wis. — Local bald man Gene Zielinski is petitioning the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention today, demanding they include hats as mandatory protective…
The other day The Hard Times was at a coffee shop and ahead of us in line was a real-live 40-year-old in a beanie. He…
ATLANTA -— Stubborn, delusional punk Drew Blaney, who has lost a third of his mohawk due to his receding hairline, will not fix his increasingly…