Ow! Seriously, that really fucking hurts! It feels like you’re slowly slitting my bicep with a hot, wet scalpel. I guess now I know how…
Graffiti is art. Period. It’s a wonderful form of creative expression that brings much needed life to the sterile walls and boring blocks of apartments…
CHICAGO — Local barista Jeffrey Stern had a creative breakthrough after thinking of the perfect name for a band that will never exist outside of…
PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Local tattoo enthusiast Ben Drury admitted that the meaning behind a large tattoo of a viking skeleton throwing a fireball currently being…
BOSTON — A study by researchers at MIT has found that nearly every person who has publicly denounced a canceled artist continues to listen to…
We’ve all been there. You’re jamming along to a new track. The beat? Incredible. The lyrics? Insightful. The message? Well, they’re singing about a trampoline…
CHICAGO — Singer-songwriter Kyla Bernhardt learned today just how much her fans have failed to successfully parse the artistic intent behind her songs and many…
CHICAGO — Local punk Kyla Waters has spent the past 24 hours trying to decide if her roommate’s new tattoo either looks nothing like Jack…
Sacramento, Calif. — Northpoint Middle School seventh grader and tattoo wunderkind Connor Butler is quickly expanding his portfolio from a transparent cube to the decidedly…
LOS ANGELES — Local tattoo artist “Big” Frank Kowlaski admitted today that he was profoundly impacted by a tattoo he inked last week of a…
LOS ANGELES — Popular podcast host Joe Rogan is set to become the first-ever artist played on the Spotify platform to be properly compensated, thanks…
CINCINNATI — Chronically unemployed local woman and semi-professional singer-songwriter Jody Salazar has no idea how to pay taxes on all the exposure she earned last…
ATLANTA — Concerned citizens in Atlanta’s eccentric Inman Park neighborhood have banded together with city officials to ensure that any graffiti in their area is…
CHICAGO — Local artist Joe Burns is reportedly refusing to take any form of antidepressants for his crippling mental illness, fearing it may inhibit his…
Internet Can’t Fucking Wait to Push Newly Famous Artist to Psychological Ruin
SEATTLE, WA — Internet commentators and online communities announced this morning that they are “fucking stoked” to push recently famous musician Hank Todd past the…