Patrick Crooks
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Well, this is just a fucking mess. Last night I went on what my ex refers to as one of…
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Patrick Crooks
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BAYONNE, N.J. — Rooney’s Tavern resident sad guy John Russo is reportedly nothing more than a lonely, pathetic alcoholic, despite…
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Patrick Coyne
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SAINT PAUL, Minn. — Local man and “Mr. Fucking Big Shot” Dan Paulson was allegedly acting last night “like his…
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Kevin Tit
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Friends are arguably just as, if not more, important than family. A bond thicker than blood. They’re there for us…
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Jordan Breeding
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HARRISONBURG, Va. — Local punk and obvious alcoholic Marcia Fries announced moments ago that despite consuming nearly a dozen cans…
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Steve Yuen
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Some people are able to drink in moderation. I’ve been told, on many occasions, that I am certainly not one…
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Patrick Coyne
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BALTIMORE — Self-proclaimed beer snob Jeremy Drika pretended last night to thoughtfully peruse the beer list at a local brewpub…
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Parker Newman
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SACRAMENTO, Calif. — An episode of the mental health podcast Forgetting Sarah Tonin went unrecorded this week due to technical…
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Jordan Breeding
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FAIRBANKS, Alaska — Obvious alcoholic and general mess of a human being Jerrold Long announced today that he will spend…
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Dan Kozuh
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C’mon, what are you, some kinda’ pussy?! Do this beer bong, bro! Don’t wuss out on me. I invite you…
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