NEW YORK — Scientists at the Fashion Institute of Technology confirmed there is no way to take off a pullover sweatshirt without showing everyone your…
Pardon me, sir! Yeah I’m talking to you pal, roll your damn window down. I couldn’t help but notice you puttering along the highway like…
PARMA, Ohio — Local metal band Devilskull were relieved when they came to an agreement on a band name that only four other bands in…
LOS ANGELES — Acclaimed film director Sam Mendes announced that his ambitious portrayal of the Beatles, which will be told through four separate films focusing…
SANTA FE, N.M. — American novelist George R.R. Martin admitted that his highly anticipated book “The Winds of Winter” was once again delayed due to…
You’re a horror fan, and you’re starting to feel like you’ve seen it all. You’ve grown tired of such pedestrian debates as “’Halloween 3′ is…
CALABASAS, Calif. — Shoppers at The Commons were treated to the stylings of local hardcore band xMOSTxSINCERESTx, who opened their set in the shopping center’s…
Shit. This is bad. We just had the first of our daily stand-ups with the new team lead, and he’s trying really hard to make…
LOUISVILLE, Ky. — Local metal musician Draven Whitlock revealed this week that he completed a touching song combining his two greatest desires; an eternal relationship…
NEW WINDSOR, Md. — Longtime cop enthusiast Lou Mandin seamlessly transitioned from a locally known bootlicker to a Trump sneaker licker after purchasing the former…
Heavy metal and parental outrage, name a more iconic duo. From the early days of rock n roll satanic panic, and even congressional hearings, metal…
Life is great and all, but after 30 years or so of it, a certain apathetic malaise starts to set in. The day-to-day grind starts…
SPRINGFIELD, Ill. — Guitarist Leo “Injustice” Murphy was recently ejected from his former band, skate-punk outfit Lincoln’s Foreskin, over an incident where his use of…
Look, I totally understand that once I release my music, it’s subject to scrutiny. But before you pass judgment, just know that my songs have…
BALTIMORE — Local punk Ricky Turnbull disavowed disgraced pop punk band Finisher’s Medal by covering their once-prominent patch on his jacket with a slightly larger…