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Every Rugrats Character Ranked by How Much Gambling Destroyed Their Lives

15. Angelica Pickles

Angelica was raised with a taste for the finer things in life. Cookies, Cynthia dolls, designer drugs, etc. When mommy and daddy cut her off she became a full time casino fleece, charming and scamming high rollers by the dozen and picking up a love of the roulette wheel along the way. Well, the “prettiest, most beautiful girl in the universe” routine got old fast. The high life aged her fast, and pit bosses got wise to her act. She was soon banned from every major casino from Vegas to Atlantic city. Today she waits tables at a dinner to fuel her scratch card addiction. .

14. Drew Pickles

Drew was always more practical and “mature” than his toy-inventing younger brother Stu. At first, he didn’t view his stock trading as “gambling” per se, just practical investments. And that hot tip he got from his college buddy wasn’t “insider trading,” it was just good old fashioned networking! Well, the SCC disagreed. Drew is currently serving out a 10 year sentence in a white collar prison.

13. Randy Carmichael

You would think a writer as successful as the creative force behind “Dummi Bears” would be immune from losing it all at roulette, but that’s happened to Randy countless times. He’s one of those writers whose talent is fuelled by high highs and low lows, and he needs to constantly put it all on the line to create.

12. Didi Pickles

Didi was content as a housewife and home economics teacher until an appearance on the game show “Super Stumpers” introduced her to the thrill of trivia for cash. She started hitting up bar trivia nights and made a killing, but soon enough gift cards weren’t enough action for her. She started making side bets with the other teams, and before long bar trivia was a gambling epicenter large enough to draw mob attention. In 2015 she was pressured to throw a round, but refused to pretend she didn’t know that Richard Nixon’s first VP was Spiro Agnew. The mafia burned the Pickles home to the ground.

11. Edwin Carmichael

Sometimes intelligence can backfire. Edwin became convinced that he could develop a computer program that would mathematically predict winning lottery numbers. Did he succeed? Yes, he did. And he’s been on the run ever since. You don’t fuck with state money Edwin.

10. Tommy Pickles

“A babies gotta do what a babies gotta do” sounds a lot less cute when it’s said by a 30 year old man stealing his girlfriend’s car to go cool his heels in Mexico. Especially one who still wears a diaper so he doesn’t have to leave a poker table.

9. Alyssa Carmichael

When we first meet Alyssa she’s a typical teenager whose biggest fear is getting a pimple. Today she’s a grown woman wondering where she’s going to come up with 20 grand before mob enforcer Tommy “Nosejob” McNnicky cuts off her… well, you know.

8. Chuckie Finster

Chuckie’s timidness kept him from getting tangled up from the mob, but he got way into the scratchies. Eventually he inhaled so much scratch off residue that he developed a rare lung disorder and is kept alive by a machine.

7. Stu Pickles

Any man who supports a family of four as a “toy inventor” is a man who believes in himself and isn’t afraid to take chances. It’s an attitude that served him well, until he got into sports betting. Stu had a system. He studied football stats obsessively and thought that he cracked the code. Hell, maybe he did at first, but it was his initial success that would be his undoing. Pretty soon he was in deep with the wrong kind of people. He lost everything, and his current wearabout are unknown.

6. Spike

Gambling hurts the gambler, sure, but it’s the people close to them that wind up paying the highest price. When Stu’s sports betting got him in hot water he did the only thing he could think of—he got Spike involved with dog fighting. The Siberian Tiger Hound was a force of nature in the pit, and he never suffered so much as a scratch, but he would forever be haunted by the things he did for the Pickles family.

5. Grandpa Lou

Grandpa spun many a tall tale in his day, but the story of “Tell Vinnie I’ll have his money, I just need another week!” was one he just couldn’t sell. It’s a good thing Grandpa loves sleep, because he’ll be doing it with the fishes forever now.

4. Phil DeVille

Phil got himself an itch for the ponies and wound up in so much debt there was a hit out for him. In a cruel twist of fate the hitmen mistook his twin sister Lil for him, and assassinated her.

3. Lil DeVille

Coincidentally Lil also got addicted to horse betting and got in so much debt a hit was put on her head. The hitmen assigned to take her out wound up mistaking Phil for her, and assassinated him on the same day she died. Twins, right? Can’t make this stuff up.

2. Larry and Steve

They were tired of toiling away at dead end jobs. Then, Larry’s connected uncle told him a story about some friends of his that robbed a high stakes card game to earn respect. They thought they could do the same thing, and they were wrong. Dead wrong.

1. Dil Pickles

Ever since he was a baby, Dil wanted everything “now.” Coming of age during the Texas Hold’em boom of 2010, that attitude drew him in like a moth to the flame. He dropped out of school and came to Vegas on a Greyhound bus with dreams of making it to ESPN. That was the last time anyone saw him.

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