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Venue Opens Gender-Neutral Bathroom on Neighbor’s Fence

PHILADELPHIA — Management at the Dust Bucket DIY venue proudly announced yesterday the opening of a new, gender-neutral spot on the property’s neighboring fence for all patrons to relieve themselves, according to a post on their Facebook page.

“The Dust Bucket has always stood for tolerance and acceptance,” the post read. “For over 30 years, people of all genders and sexualities have attended our shows, and we’d like to make sure they can continue to do so. Starting today, the patch of fence by the condos next door is now open for the use of those who do not feel comfortable in a binary-gendered restroom.”

LGBTQ scene members expressed gratitude for the venue’s courageous move to enable trans, non-binary, and otherwise non-cisgendered patrons to use the bathroom directly on the wooden fence separating the venue from a small, three-story condominium.

“I’ve always felt out of place doing coke in the male bathrooms there,” said trans woman Shiree Benson. “Not just because it’s a reminder of my birth-assigned gender I was forced to conform to for so many years of my life, but also, it smells like shit in there. The fence is the ideal spot for anyone trying to pop a quick piss without judgement.”

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The move is in response to a campaign led by many LGBTQ resource centers and support groups in the area.

“We are proud that our initiative to empower and support people of all genders is slowly but surely making a difference,” said non-binary punk and president of the Philadelphia GSA Ari Bonowitz. “We are confident that the Dust Bucket’s decision to allow people like me use the bathroom on that fence is a step we can all support. We still need toilet paper out there, but it’s a step in the right direction.”

Ben Smithson, the property manager of the condo, had some opinions on the new fence waste disposal spot as well.

“Look, I’m non-binary too, okay? I support the rights of the LGBTQ. But why my fence? We already had to replace half of it last year when some idiot backed their van up and knocked it over,” said Smithson. “Now the venue is encouraging everyone to piss all over the thing? There are a series of bushes 20 feet away that’d be perfect to piss in.”

The Dust Bucket’s gender neutral spot has been marked with a rainbow colored “SAFE SPACE” sign, which has also been urinated on.