BEDFORD, Ind. — Grocery store clerk Max Bryce recently experienced an ego death after ingesting over five grams of psychedelic mushrooms, regained said ego after…
OCEANVIEW, Ill. — Local sixth-grade do-gooder Richie Amweather reportedly risked his own well-being at last night’s hardcore show in order to help a geriatric woman…
LAS VEGAS — Lifelong straight edger Logan McGuire spent the majority of his future brother-in-law’s bachelor party convincing the stripper to go vegan, despite being…
MARIETTA, Ga. — Local IT manager Caleb Summers was taken aback earlier this week to receive a Facebook Event invitation from high school friend of…
ANN ARBOR— A new study out of the University of Michigan found that 95% of bras being worn worldwide contain a small handful of popcorn…
MILWAUKEE — Local guitarist and dad of two, Andy Kim, innocently believes that he is still a member of local metal outfit Flesh Breath even…
BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — Local man Eric Case realized he’s technically fasting after being forced to boycott his favorite brands Chick-fil-A and Bud Light for going…
TIGARD, Ore. — Reports indicate that urban sprawl and logging are decimating the forest preserves that once teamed with teenagers drinking alcohol stolen from their…
CHICAGO – Sex bot and general scammer SEXsingleMAlloRy was shocked to discover she was a fan of Chicago band Rat Ass’ new music, tech sources…
DELRAY, Mich. — Leading Juggalo scientists confirmed fascinating new research which indicates that “whoop whoop” has numerous meanings including “hello,” “goodbye,” and “show me your…
BOULDER, Colo. — Local woman Berkley Bauer has reportedly bought another fancy new water bottle that is hopefully going to kickstart a whole new lifestyle,…
WONKAVILLE — Lucky golden ticket winner Charlie Bucket, age 9, was surprised to find himself the recipient of a $98.75 bill from Ticketmaster Entertainment, Inc.…
ADELPHI, Md. — Local Mom, Susan Campbell, informed her son’s band to keep playing and not to pay her any mind as she is just…
LOS ANGELES – Steven Spielberg recently expressed regret for censoring the 20th anniversary release of “E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial” by editing out the guns and the…
WASHINGTON — Recently sentenced seditionist Stewart Rhodes told friends and family that he has a pretty good idea about which gang he intends to join…