Jeremy Kaplowitz
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HEAVEN — The almighty being who created the heavens and earth, God, admitted today that it’s actually kinda gay to…
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Owen Crowlie
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WASHINGTON — In order to streamline distribution, sources are reporting that Universal Basic Income will be distributed to Americans via…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
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WASHINGTON — Members of the Democratic National Committee expressed frustration about the annoying escort mission to get former vice president…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
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WASHINGTON — President Trump has announced plans to unleash a giant squid on each of the major cities in the…
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Joe Tilleli
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MINEOLA, N.Y. — Tom Castellano was reportedly unable to comprehend that the liberal team were being presented as the good…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
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NEW HORIZONS — Those playing the newly released Animal Crossing: New Horizons for the Nintendo Switch noted that there was…
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Seth Finkelstein
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In our political climate, there is no lack of problems to be solved. Climate change, student loan debt, trade disputes.…
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Jolie Darrow
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BURLINGTON, Vt. — In the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic, Senator Bernie Sanders has called on Nintendo to preemptively release…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
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WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump is being attacked by prominent Democrats today after he claimed he found Mew under a…
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Grant Mulitz
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DULUTH, Minn. — Claiming it’s been the cheapest and most accessible health power-up since getting kicked off of his parents’…
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