The Mandela Effect is the age-old behavioral phenomenon where large swaths of people misremember specific details about a person, event, or cereal brand. For instance, most people appear to be under the impression that Nelson Mandela died in prison in the ‘80s, when in reality he’s still alive today and living in Wisconsin, I think.
The same applies to you. Your friends sort of remembered a guy kind of like you with blond hair, if you even had hair, but it’s clearly a mixture of a brownish, blackish hue. Not to mention your name is Craig or Greg, not Jason. Or maybe it’s Paul. Definitely not Kevin. At least we’re pretty sure.
Either way, minor details like this sort of fall to the wayside, and our brains naturally create a different reality to fill in the otherwise non-descript gaps. Oh wait, Mike! It’s Mike, right?
Anyway, just about everyone on planet Earth will tell you that it’s spelled “Fruit Loops” when the truth of the matter is that it’s stylized as “Froot Loops.” Yes, Kellogg’s has been mind-fucking you this whole time. The same psychological perversion is the exact reason people don’t remember that you actually went to high school and college with them.
You were even best friends with them senior year. Now? You’re not even a memory worth storing in their hippocampus, pre-frontal cortex, and amygdala. This is not your fault. The Mandela Effect should take all the blame.
Sure, you could’ve stayed in touch or called them to see how they were doing every so often. But unfortunately, the Mandela Effect will take hold of them and erase you as a concept, no matter how hard you try to cultivate their friendship. This is why no one has friends past the age of 37. They just forget you ever existed.
Memories are a tricky thing. For instance, no one remembers that you once came out of the restroom in second grade with wet pants in your crotch area and for the next 10 years everyone called you Pee Stain, even though it was just water from the sink. Actually, maybe the Mandela Effect is a good thing.