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How To Make Friends Outside The Venue When You Don’t Smoke

It used to be effortless making friends outside the venue when you were a smoker. Usually you’d just ask if anyone had a light and boom, you were part of the crew. But now, it’s hard to break that barrier when you’re just kind of standing there with your hands on your hips, looking around, hoping that someone will make eye contact with you or compliment the shirt you’re wearing. Here are five alternative ways to approach the art of making friends outside the venue when you don’t smoke.

Fake a shared past

Who doesn’t want an impromptu catch-up with an old friend at a concert? Never a better setting than this. Keep that in mind when approaching a stranger from behind. Try placing a firm hand on their shoulder and say, “Oh my god, hey man, how are you? Do you remember me? We met at that Craigslist sleep study way back in the day.” If you’re wearing a baseball cap and dark sunglasses they will probably go along with all of it just to be polite, and that is more than enough for you.

Bring a prop to keep your hands busy

You’ve got to look casual if you want to seem approachable. Try bringing a prop to the show to keep those fidgety hands occupied. This will make it seem like you’re just out here to shoot the shit and get some air, like everyone else. Some great ideas include Chinese finger traps, a deck of cards, or a handful of peanuts to shake around in one hand and snack on while grinning like Matthew McConaughey.

Hand out business cards

When you’re a smoker, organic conversations blossom with minimal effort, but without this social lubricant, you’re gonna need a backup plan. Try a little old-fashioned networking! Let them know about your side hustle: Stuff ‘Em Up, a taxidermy business you run with your uncle who just got out of prison. You can try an opener like, “Did you know the term ‘taxidermy’ is derived from ancient Greek words for ‘arrangement of skin?’ You should totally come to the warehouse and check it out.”

Pretend you know the band

An instant way to impress smokers outside the venue is by telling them you know the band. Of course they’ll be interested, and there’s no way they will know anyone in the band. Just let them know that you know what’s up. Be careful that you don’t approach anyone standing too close to a van loaded with gear, that might actually be the band and you would look very stupid if you got caught bragging about knowing them to their face. Choose your targets wisely.

Share some snacks

You’d think smoking would curb cravings, but you’d be completely wrong. Between songs when smokers are taking a break to get some air and have a drag, they’re usually hoping a stranger will approach them with a little snack. I mean, who doesn’t love a Wether’s original between sets? You can also try a Nature Valley bar or some Greek yogurt. If all else fails, you can’t go wrong with a fistful of shredded mozzarella straight from the bag.

Hope these tips help!