Every Alexisonfire Album Ranked Worst to Best
Alexisonfire’s official website exists at the URL theonlybandever.com. Pretty bold claim, if you ask me. But then I started looking…
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John Danek
451 stories found
10 Bands Whose Names Don’t Match Their Sound and Frankly it Makes Us So Mad We Lit Our Car on Fire
“Never judge a book by its cover” is the type of thing a dickhead teacher says to a student to…
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Punk Family Boos As Son Walks Up to Receive Diploma
MILWAUKEE — The ashamed parents and siblings of recent high school graduate Chase Benson booed, hissed, and jeered as he…
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Experts Predict Couple from Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge Will Finally Touch Lips in 2049
NEWARK, N.J. — Geologists predict the man and woman on the cover of My Chemical Romance’s landmark 2004 album “Three…
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Every Mastodon Album Ranked
The members of Mastodon look like they smell pretty bad. In the world of sludgy prog metal, this is a…
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Propagandhi Stop Concert Mid-Set to Give Pop Quiz
WINNIPEG, Manitoba — Political punk thrashers Propagandhi paused a hometown show in the middle of their set to administer a…
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More Big Tech Woes: LCD Soundsystem Announces Round of Layoffs
NEW YORK — VC startup and indie music factory LCD Soundsystem announced their first-ever round of layoffs affecting all organizational…
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Every Black Flag Album Ranked
Black Flag is a legendary band people love to lie about listening to. Every indie artist name-drops them as an…
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Music Fan Nostalgic for Days when Pitchfork Made Him Feel Like Complete Dumbass
CHICAGO — Ravenous music fan Terry Manns feels a wistful sense of melancholy for the days when music publication Pitchfork.com…
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Isn’t It Ironic? You Fuckers Have Been Correcting My Definition of “Ironic” for Years, Yet I’m Currently Shitting on a Hand-Crafted Calacatta Marble Toilet Paid for by the Royalties of That Song (guest post by Alanis Morissette)
Isn’t it ironic? A singer-songwriter scores a hydrogen bomb explosion of a hit in 1996 despite nOt kNoWiNg tHe dEfInItIoN…
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