WINNIPEG, Manitoba — Political punk thrashers Propagandhi paused a hometown show in the middle of their set to administer a pop quiz which evaluated the audience’s understanding of their lyrical themes, panicked fans reported.
“Propagandhi had just finished melting our faces with the solo at the end of ‘Purina Hall of Fame’ when merch and sound guys started scurrying around the crowd giving out paper and pencils,” recounted a scarred Elaine Motts, who dropped out of high school precisely to avoid situations like this. “Chris Hannah then asked ten questions, while Sulynn walked around the crowd watching for cheating and Todd screamed at people for talking. There were questions about Moby Dick, the FBI’s COINTELPRO program, and Ethiopian emperors. I definitely failed. Fuck, I’m going to have to retake remedial punk at the NOFX farewell tour before I can attempt to pass Propgandhi again.”
Members of the band admitted frustration at their audiences’ ignorance pertaining to the subject matter of their catalog.
“I can only listen to someone butcher the phrase ‘Mate Ka Moris Ukun Rasik An’ before I wonder if our messages are sinking in,” explained drummer Jord Samolesky, who devised the evaluation method. “We’re calling it No Punk Left Behind, and I think it’s really starting to show results. We’ve always been about more than just sick riffs and insane drum fills, we are edutainment à la the Oregon Trail. People complain that the tests are too hard, but we recently added extra credit like listing hosts of Hockey Night in Canada.”
Educators praised the Manitoba band for their insistence on combining education with art.
“It appears to already have an influence on other bands. The Lawrence Arms stopped a show last night to administer a class on taste pairing cigarettes with well whiskeys,” said Dr. Orin Marklard, dean of the Department of Education at The University of Winnipeg. “Propagandhi’s subject matter is astonishingly difficult. I could only answer one or two questions, but admittedly I’m more of a ‘How to Clean Everything’ fan than any of their later work.”
Reports indicate Propagandhi’s sellout show the following night was sparsely attended with the band receiving over 800 emails about the sudden deaths of audience members’ grandmothers.