Doctor Informs Crying Family of Son’s Rapidly Advancing Zappa Phase
OGDEN, Utah — Local parents Sydney and Cole Pickard were informed by a family doctor yesterday that their teenage son…
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Joe Rumrill
170 stories found
Family Band Now Family Solo Project After Tragic Accident
BRANSON, Mo. — Teddy Hitherton, the lead guitarist and backup vocalist of The Hitherton Family Jamboree Gang, announced yesterday that…
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Punk Ice Cream Truck Rips Through “Turkey in the Straw” in Like 12 Seconds
HAVERHILL, Mass. — A punk-themed ice cream truck impressed potential patrons yesterday with a raw, energetic version of “Turkey in…
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Jeans Accidentally Cut-Off Vertically
TEMPE, Ariz. — Local idiot Eli Burkhardt made a fool of himself today by accidentally cutting off his jeans vertically,…
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Audience Just Sticking Around to See How Drummer Incorporates That Gong
BARRE, Vt. — Audience members at a local mixed bill show have collectively agreed to stick around for a little…
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Vocoder Really Livening Up Eulogy
DANBURY, Conn. — Local woman Allison Moore brought some joy to an otherwise somber moment earlier today by delivering the…
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Animal Signs Deal to Eat Exclusively Zildjian Cymbals
NORWELL, Mass. — Animal, the eccentric drummer of Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem, signed a lucrative endorsement deal today…
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Street Musician Really Could Use Street Sound Guy
NEW YORK — Veteran street musician Doug “The Jackrabbit” Landers was once again criticized today for his awful sound quality,…
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Confused Crowd Searches for Thrown Stick That Is Actually Behind Drummer’s Back
SANTA FE, N.M. — Much of the audience for Sante Fe doom metal band Cackler frantically searched last night to…
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“Telephone Pole Wanted” Flyer Stapled to Local Bassist
NEW HAVEN, Conn. — Members of the street team for City Councilwoman Lynn Fernandez stapled a flyer yesterday with the…
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