Philly has unfairly been the butt end of a lot of jokes about being full of misanthropic sports gremlins, but if we’re being honest with…
SEATTLE — Local goth Amelia Jones discovered the only way she can fall asleep is through the use of a white noise machine projecting the…
I’ve often been called a late bloomer. While I’ve always resented that label, everyone who called me that had a fair point: I refuse to…
MINNEAPOLIS — Target announced they would be reducing this year’s selection of Pride merchandise to a single t-shirt depicting an androgynous person shrugging in response…
NEW YORK — Riders on the New York subway’s C train caught a rare act of generosity as a man gave up his seat for…
Those of us lucky enough to own a home know how much of a pain in the ass they are to maintain, both physically and…
CHATTANOOGA, Tenn. — Local conservative Bill Wallace announced he’s ramped up his fight against the liberal agenda by spending $4,000 a month to lease his…
Damn girl, this night has been magical. Looking at you now has me breaking out into a cold sweat. Like a concerning amount of sweat.…
NEW YORK — A preview of the upcoming children’s book based on the lyrics of The Hold Steady’s “Stay Positive” revealed a majority of the…
Like the quests for the Fountain of Youth or the Holy Grail, I too have spent what feels like eons searching for something I thought…
It’s been said there are no such thing as coincidences, and that naturally occurring phenomena can be explained no matter how bizarre it may first…
Kids these days, what’s up with them? Seriously, we have no idea what the hell is going on with Gen Alpha and they are terrifying,…
There is probably no inalienable right greater than freedom of expression, and what better way to tell the world that you saw Hawthorne Heights at…
There is something that’s been bothering me for nearly 20 years now, and I’m sure a few of you may have had sleepless nights over…
LANSING, Mich. — Local 72-year-old conservative Gerald Wakowski was on the verge of a complete meltdown after a passerby misgendered his coveted ‘77 Ford Mustang,…