Mark Delaney
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WORCESTER, Mass. — A new landmark study published today by my fiancée and son suggests a strong link between violent…
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Mark Roebuck
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THE INTERNET — A Facebook friend of yours, whom you vaguely recall from high school, couldn’t be more excited to…
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John Danek
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BOULDER, Colo. — Scientists at the University of Colorado have confirmed that marijuana severely impairs the ability to grasp tasteful…
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Ed Saincome
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Whitewashing. Cookie-cutter protagonist. A happy ending so out of touch with reality you can actually sleep at night. Sound familiar?…
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Grayson Nite
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DENVER — Sources have reported that slick-talking seventeen-year-old, Marty Johnson, went into a grocery store and used his high charisma…
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Chuck Kowalski
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VALLEY STREAM, N.Y. — Suggesting you “could definitely put it to good use,” your dad reminded you this morning that…
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Davin Givhan
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SEATTLE — Online retail behemoth Amazon will roll out their new “Glory Hole” home subscription service this month in select…
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Brendan Krick
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PHILADELPHIA — Local dog Scraps was completely unable to answer basic trivia questions yesterday about the seminal horror-punk band Misfits,…
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Dan Rice
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There is no denying it: The current state of affairs is grim. The nation is in the hands of a…
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Jon Lalu
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WASHINGTON — The IRS announced today, that based on a litany, video game company Electronic Arts will now be officially…
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