PROVIDENCE, R.I. — A life-long fan of the political rock group Rage Against the Machine expressed outrage that the band’s politics had changed from how…
CHARLEROI, Pa. — Lifelong punk Hunter Burchuk experienced the startling epiphany that moshing is “dumb as hell” during a recent local hardcore show, concerned friends…
TALLAHASSEE, Fla. — Florida Governor Ron DeSantis signed a new bill that bans the word “gay” from being used in any Christmas songs past or…
AUBURN HILLS, Mich. — George Quinn, an account manager at the Babaco insurance company, recently realized the amount of sheer envy he had for a…
SARATOGA SPRINGS, N.Y — Local cigar smoker Charles Morley and his group of male friends who look and act exactly like him announced their raison…
BEND, Ore. — Local crust punk Exena Groman admitted that she is only able to relieve her bladder if multiple people are watching and it…
FRESNO, Calif. — Local sticker hook up Archie Sutherfield said he would love to talk to you about an incredible opportunity and deal that he…
ANAHEIM, Calif. — Local drummer Brendan Molina cannot believe how unbelievably rude his neighbors are being by constantly pounding on the walls of their shared…
CHICAGO — Local woman Bethany Bryant was accosted while wearing a T-shirt depicting Albert Einstein by a man who demanded that she prove her understanding…
BERKELEY, Calif. — Touring band ‘The Flattered & The Curious’ regaled tenants of the apartment they are crashing in with tales from the road while…
EDINA, Minn. — 37-year-old man Steve Bellows opted for chicken fingers for his seventh consecutive dinner outing despite having poured over the entire 23-page menu…
PORTLAND, Ore. — Local man Terry Miller became the target of derision and mockery from patrons at upscale eatery Stem when he showed up wearing…
BOSTON — Friends and relatives of local resident, Brian Gibbs, have reported that the 28-year-old has insisted for years that his frequent tremors are due…
BUFFALO, N.Y. — A bag of baby spinach sitting untouched in a local fridge is currently coming to the inevitable conclusion that it will die…
LAS VEGAS — Pop punk fan and amateur blackjack player Devin Suggs has fallen into debt after instinctively hitting on hands of 15, disgusted sources…