Jeff Bender
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What do you think of when you hear the word “spy”? Do you picture an overcoated man with a fedora…
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Dom Turek
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Don’t bother with handwriting analyses, enneagram tests, and aura readings. Don't even worry about attachment theory or astrology forecasts. The…
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Tim Graham
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ABILENE, Texas — Local school sports fan Steven Flick will no longer offer his support if there’s a chance he…
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Kelley Greene
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SANTA FE, N.M. — American novelist George R.R. Martin admitted that his highly anticipated book “The Winds of Winter” was…
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KANSAS CITY, Mo. — Famed journalist and serviette Nardwuar was reportedly “upset and disturbed” after his most recent interview with…
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Ryan Dondero
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RIVERSIDE, Calif. — Pathetic fucking nerd James Flick admitted that he knows the names of every band member in every…
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John Danek
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You’ve really crossed the line this time. Consider my feelings officially hurt. A restraining order?!? Never in my life have…
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Peter Woods
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HOPKINGTON, Mass. — Local creep Brad Hinton announced his plans to run a full marathon, moments after seeing a woman…
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Doug Francisco
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LOS ANGELES — Podcast fan Garth Hickman announced recently that he's confident that he would be best friends with Zach…
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Tom Peters
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Taylor Swift’s new song “Look What You Made Me Do” was recently knocked from the number one chart position by…
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