They say the day your child is born is supposed to be the greatest day of your life. I’m here to tell you that’s a…
WASHINGTON — Your parents, who have spent every waking moment for the past 20 years preparing for the end of humanity, once again asked when…
PITTSBURGH — Local tenant Bob Kasah was shocked to find his child was painted over in his sleep by his completely spatially and situationally unaware…
Marijuana use is on the rise, and while it’s completely harmless and fun for you to consume, to a child with a still developing mind,…
PORTLAND, Ore. — New parents and self-described “post-punk connoisseurs” Sara and Tom Mitchell proudly unveiled the name of their newborn child, Untitled, bewildered hospital sources…
So you and your partner have decided to call it quits. Maybe it’s a conscious uncoupling, maybe it’s a messy, drawn-out horror divorce the likes…
SEATTLE — Thirty-seven-year-old father Peter Goodman recently sat down with his son, Jamiroquai, to explain the intimate mechanics of sexual maturity, which by Goodman’s description…
Timmy, I need to start treating you like the young man that you are. Hell, you’re practically a teenager. It’s time to grow up, give…
MILFORD, Conn. – Local man Gary Miller’s fleeting moment of peace away from his grueling, hellish, and tedious daily life was instantly destroyed by the…
It’s no secret that good dads are hard to find, especially when it comes to raising a daughter. Any dad who fosters individuality and confidence…
As parents, we have to make sacrifices all the time. Any parent will tell you this. You can miss your kid’s first steps because you’re…
There’s nothing worse than a gray, flavorless steak. You might as well be eating a piece of shoe leather! Fortunately, we can give you tips…
BERLIN, Wisc. — Local friend Cassie Aragon was not sure whether to meet Maggie Baumgarter’s news that she’s pregnant with excitement or deep sympathy after…
We all love degenerate gambling, but if you grew up with a poppa who needed “a new pair of shoes” you grew up with a…
Look, there’s no easy way to say this so I’ll just come right out with it: I enjoy having more money. Wow, it feels good…