It took me years to finally quit smoking. I’m really proud of myself. I’ve pretty much lost the desire to smoke altogether. Unless of course…
AMES, Iowa — Local midwest emo band Local Tennis released a new album titled “Oops! All Intros” which features 36 introductions to songs that appear…
The new year is almost here and it’s time to pick a resolution that has value, which means you need a resolution that will piss…
AUSTIN, Texas — Aging punk Sean Dennings shocked the local community when he swapped a New Year’s Eve rager for a quiet night at home,…
PHILADELPHIA — Local Punk, Sid Stott, announced his plans to improve his health and well-being by smoking healthier cigarettes in the New Yea, skeptical sources…
Both Beyoncé and Taylor Swift have made this clear: they refuse to be part of any narrative that pits two women against each other. And…
MILPITAS, Calif. — Local data analyst Wendell Peters reportedly received the dreaded “we need to talk” text message, sent from his AI ChatBot Girlfriend, confirmed…
I can’t believe that this keeps happening! What are the odds that another Tinder date had to leave in the middle of me describing how…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — DJ Crockroach of famed metal act Assfault Muffinz admitted that he spends most of his time on-stage at the band’s gigs listening…
When you meet a new person, it can be hard to get a read on them. Is he an intellectual, or just wearing glasses? Do…
LAKE PLACID, N.Y. — Sexually curious man Alex Poe was forced to memorize three pages of acronyms before diving into a new kink, sources who…
Cumming is cool and all, but not cumming is what the real sex pros are doing. For some people, this process of prolonging an orgasm…
SANTA FE, N.M. — Local punk Trevor McGill was shocked but not surprised to find the only existing photo of him not blackout drunk was…
HARTFORD, Conn. — Local woman Kirsten Russet decided to rescind her “out” status as bisexual following online rumors that Paramore is breaking up, sources confirmed.…
Do you have cold hands and really want everyone to know about it? Have you ever looked at sand and thought, ‘Mmm, I want that…