Malcolm Whitfield
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CINCINNATI — Local father and metalhead Conrad Dungy has forbidden his children from opening up any mosh pits until Christmas…
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Brandon Onda
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AMERICA — Americans across the nation are struggling to remember their previous holiday traditions as they prep for their first…
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Contributor
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LODI, N.J. — A highly anticipated Christmas album from punk legends The Misfits consists primarily of songs about Halloween, multiple…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
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NEW YORK — The Rabinowitzes, a family of New York hardcore Jews, have already finished their Hanukkah celebration this year,…
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Matt Kona
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There is a great disturbance in the force: the disturbance of a healthy childhood. While the release of The Last…
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Patrick Coyne
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SEATTLE — The War on Christmas took a disturbing turn this week when radicalized Starbucks employees released a shocking video…
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Steve Fiorillo
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EVANSTON, Ill. — Punk mother Danica Friedman announced she would be distributing a compilation of previously unreleased, rarely tasted Thanksgiving…
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Mark Roebuck
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THE SUBURBS — Your mother left you a stern voicemail this morning, reminding you that if you want to participate…
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Ashley Naftule
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WASHINGTON — President Trump pardoned a 5-year old Bourbon Red turkey named Mikey this morning, sparking outrage amongst law enforcement…
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The Hard Times Staff
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HANSON, Mass. — Local punk Brandon Gardner will continue his annual Thanksgiving tradition of hiding from his family in his…
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