Connor McGarry
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May 30, 2020
ROCKVILLE, Md. — Bethesda Softworks announced a new “Pandemic Update” for their hit RPG, The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, in…
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Alex Salcido
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May 30, 2020
WASHINGTON — President Trump’s experimental use of the anti-malarial drug Hydroxychloroquine has transformed the Commander-in-Chief from a boorish, morbidly obese,…
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J.W. White
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May 29, 2020
Sup’ corona-crotches! So you’re stuck in your house and you can’t go anywhere. You’ve been cooped up so long now…
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Patrick Crooks
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May 25, 2020
SAN DIEGO — Thanks to the slowdown in day-to-day police activity, local officer Scott Martinson is now committing abuses of…
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Freelancer
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May 25, 2020
In these strange and uncertain times, it seems like the world we once knew is gone for good. But hey,…
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Mark Roebuck
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May 23, 2020
BOSTON — Ska legends The Mighty Mighty Bosstones announced today that they will reopen for business this week at 50%…
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Zach Russell
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May 22, 2020
ANNAPOLIS, Md. — Lifelong nerd Nate Guajardo emerged from a local Planet Fitness facility today “beefed out as fuck” after…
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Dan Tomascik
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May 21, 2020
ATLANTA — Scientists at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention are confirming that, following several states’ pushes to reopen,…
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Ed Saincome
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May 21, 2020
All people must unify now! Dammit, this virus doesn’t care what your race is! It will harm you and your…
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BLOOMINGTON, Minn. — A quarantined couple stuck in the same house under self-isolation since March ended their one-and-a-half year-long relationship…
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