LANSING, Mich. — Local 72-year-old conservative Gerald Wakowski was on the verge of a complete meltdown after a passerby misgendered his coveted ‘77 Ford Mustang,…
MORGANTOWN, W. Va. — Local dad and all-around asshole Bert Smilovic failed to understand criticism of his storytelling techniques which involve reducing all people to…
SILVER SPRING, Md. – Local Boomer Glen Thais created a disturbance at the insurance firm where he is employed after sending an unsolicited dick fax…
WASHINGTON — A recent study from the National Endowment for the Arts confirmed U.S. fathers zip through the nation’s art museums in an average of…
SAGINAW, Mich. — Father, husband, and delivery driver Gary Lillet recently exhumed his Fender Telecaster guitar and Peavey Classic 30 amp from a storage unit,…
NUTLEY, N.J. — Local retired baby boomer Grant Walters confirmed that the “something to cry about” threat he used to scare his children decades ago…
CHAGRIN FALLS, Ohio — Leftist senior citizen Cyrus Novak is reportedly under round-the-clock duress from continuously having to make sure John Fogerty is not somehow…
INDIANOLA, Iowa — Millennial Jenny Fang was sorely mistaken in thinking five days at her parent’s over Christmas would be enough time to solve the…
Running a business is hard right now. With the unreliable supply chain, labor shortages, and the price of materials, any business is lucky to make…
Everyone knows free market capitalism was invented by Jesus and Moses right around the time they co-wrote America’s Judeo-Christian values. But quite frankly, I’m sick…
DALY CITY, Calif. — Paul “Sprout Fingers” Brecher, a devoted follower of legendary rock band The Grateful Dead, did his best to appear interested in…
You’ve already made up your mind about me. Just because I was born in 1949, you think I’m a helpless old woman in a big,…
LOS ANGELES — A new film titled “Great Again” featuring famed director Clint Eastwood reciting and acting out boomer memes he came across on Facebook…
There’s no denying that we live in a time of conflict. At no point in living memory has this country’s fault lines of class, race,…