WASHINGTON — The collection of white dorks that make up Elon Musk’s entourage asked for a significant raise if they are expected to publicly defend…
CAMBRIDGE, Mass. — Scientists at M.I.T’s prestigious Zoom Studies Lab reportedly identified the first online meeting to begin without terrible, meaningless small talk. “Observations on…
LOS ANGELES — An anxious Travis Barker reportedly did not quite know what to do or where to put his drumsticks while trying to maintain…
Is there such a thing as being too nice? I never used to think so. Whenever I would see someone in need, I would be…
PHILADELPHIA — Local musician Tommy Petro, drummer and backup vocalist for metalcore band The Song of Sisyphus, admitted he feels the same sense of awkwardness…
There’s no coming back from this one. Jeremy Macon just said ‘I love you’ to his dad instead of his intended target, seventh-grade English teacher,…
Well, it happened again! You’re a dog and your owners have decided to throw a goddamn house party, without consulting you or thinking what it…
You’re back at your date’s place and if the natural order of things follows, a Baltimore Handshake lies wait in his immediate future. You should’ve…
How was the 15-year reunion? I can’t believe it’s been a decade and a half since we graduated high school. Was Troy there? The three…
SEATTLE — Self-described “devotee” of metal vocalist and former Dillinger Escape Plan frontman Greg Puciato, Logan Diedrich, realized his life’s ambition of meeting his idol…
BELLEFONTE, Pa. — A customer at Quik Cuts Barber Shop cast an aching stare at a neighboring silent barber/customer pair while having his hair, and…
MIAMI — First time nude beach goer Simon Lowell made fellow nudists uncomfortable with his obvious anxiety surrounding what to do with his hands and…
CHICAGO — Local data analyst Jeanie Alvarez joined his coworker for a ride in her car last week, leaving him with an unexpected, everlasting feeling…
CAPITOLA, Calif. –– Awkward man Bryan Erdman revealed Monday that he is never quite sure what to do with his hands during sex, and always…
PHILADELPHIA — Protesters demanding an end to police brutality found themselves in an awkward situation today when they applauded riot police for mercilessly beating the…