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Taking the High Road: It’s Been 30 Years Since Insane Clown Posse Released “Santa’s a Fat Bitch” and I’ve Yet to Hear a Response Diss Track

These days, it seems like division is ingrained into the very fabric of our society. Whether it’s politics, religion, or even sports fandom, the possibility for otherwise civil discourse to become heated is higher than ever. Even music isn’t immune to this ever-present tension, and as a huge hip-hop fan, I find myself disheartened at the constant back-and-forth between my favorite artists. Drake and Kendrick Lamar. Eminem and Machine Gun Kelly. Gucci Mane and Young Jeezy. Some days I feel like I can’t turn my head without learning of a new beef, and the insults are enough for me to give up hope that we’ll ever find a collective higher ground.

There is, however, one example to the contrary that has continuously lifted my spirits for the past several decades. 30 years ago, Insane Clown Posse released the song “Santa’s a Fat Bitch,” and I have yet to hear a response diss track. Is it because Santa has been too busy spreading joy to millions of children year after year, or because he sees no need to stoop to the, quite frankly, churlish and juvenile levels reached in that unwarranted musical polemic? To me, it makes no difference. The precedent Santa is setting can be viewed as a shining beacon to which we all should aspire.

And don’t get me wrong, I haven’t always been confident that Santa would refrain from clapping back. After all, with lyrics like “I guess you couldn’t fit down my chimney shaft; you need to lose some of that fat ass,” could we possibly blame him had he done so? Yet, Christmas comes and goes every year with Santa thanklessly performing his duties; presumably uninterested in contributing to the ceaseless maelstrom of negativity to which we’ve become woefully accustomed. Bravo, Santa. Bravo!

I certainly hope both Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope regret their harsh and unnecessary words so many years ago, and are seeing Santa’s response (or lack thereof) as an opportunity to better themselves going forward. I suppose an honest apology from the two rhyming harlequins would be too much to hope for, but can you blame a guy for dreaming? For now, Santa is saying more with his silence than they ever have.

So let’s all take a page from Santa’s book and strive to converse with one another, instead of at one another. I promise you that such a simple pivot in our behavior will pay dividends for generations to come. Thanks, Santa!