PITTSBURGH — A local bouncer at the popular nightclub Shotbar manned his post last night with the adamant mindset to keep the COVID-19 Delta Variant…
BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — A tiny, free public library at the foot of a residential driveway was forced to ban an extremely small man who was…
COLTS NECK TOWNSHIP, N.J. — Legendary musician Bruce Springsteen recently admitted that he made up the “American working class” during a creative dry spell. “By…
NEW YORK — Local musician Kelly Evans fell victim to the age-old compliment decoy trap when a man quickly pivoted to unsolicited advice after complimenting…
VATICAN CITY — Pope Francis admitted to being concerned that punishing the French clergy responsible for decades of sexual abuse of minors may only make…
NEPTUNE, N.J. — Local supermarket cashier and goth Trish Sommers filed a multi-million dollar lawsuit against her employer after her PTO request for Halloween was…
PHILADELPHIA — Local man Eddy Taylor showed his appreciation for a beautifully composed and tastefully shot nude photo of his former co-worker posted on social…
LOS ANGELES — Handsome super secret agent Angus “Mac” MacGyver easily thwarted a series of overly elaborate and ironic death traps set by famed serial…
CUPERTINO, Calif. — Facebook services suffered the longest outage in over a year, leading directly to a massive wave of Americans finally getting vaccinated for…
PHILADELPHIA — Office hero Tom Rafferty was kind enough to unmute his microphone during the company’s team meeting so he could be heard laughing at…
PHILADELPHIA — Determined woman and job applicant Patricia O’Malley is creatively pursuing work that she’s technically overqualified to do by acting like a man who’s…
CHICAGO — Local recovering alcoholic Patrick Tolleridge is now expressing deep remorse for his past jukebox selections since getting sober, according to sources. “When I…
SAN FRANCISCO — Big-city punk Oliver Lewis recently got the name of his hometown, “Kingston,” tattooed across his stomach despite not visiting the Massachusetts town…
NEW ORLEANS — Local man who either looks good for his age or bad for his age Benjamin Button revealed that his political outlook is…
CHATTANOOGA, Tenn. — Local punk Matthew Verne reportedly suffered an immense financial loss after his mother repurposed over $26,000 worth of old band shirts into…