Dan Rice
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Well they’ve finally done it. Congress has trespassed on our rights to free speech to an unprecedented degree. By changing…
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Salim Alam
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MESA, Ariz. — Local man Russell Garcia is worried his six-week-old relationship could “turn into something more serious that will…
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Andy Holt
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When the Avicii song “Wake Me Up” came out I was living in the desert. It sucked. There was one…
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Doug Francisco
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SANTA ROSA, Calif. — Prep cook and marijuana enthusiast Alan Fisher inadvertently used his nunchucks for their deeper, lifelong purpose…
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Courtney Baka
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ANSBACH, GERMANY — Indianapolis-born stoner Pvt. Jason Jordan is “lighting up a nice fatty” at 16:20 every day as he…
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Elizabeth Teets
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BOISE, Idaho — The freshly cleaned bedroom of local woman Megan O’Leary is “anxiously excited” to meet O’Leary’s potential sexual…
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Aries (March 21-April 19) Mercury is finally out of the dickhead zone for you, so enjoy the reprieve. Use the…
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Michael Edwards
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STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. — Measureworks IT technician Jeff Simmins left dozens of bar patrons perplexed last night after singing “Svefn-g-englar”…
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Eric Navarro
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While adults are busy arguing on Facebook or getting their daily propaganda from Fox News, one high school junior is…
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Lana Schwartz
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CHICAGO — Local man Tom Bencin, who recently spent $35 on a Pussyslaughter T-shirt that reads “#1 PUSSY MURDERER” in…
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