Mark Roebuck
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DERBY, Vt. — The John Adams High School student council have launched a successful post-prom event, considered less aggressive and…
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Brett McCabe
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NEW YORK — Spotify project manager Diego Valenzuela received an unprecedented raise of $0.00437 today for single-handedly rebuilding the streaming…
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Vince Ratti
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PHILADELPHIA — Local pervert David Bell could not climax this morning during his daily commute after noticing another bus rider…
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Zach Raffio
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Warning: this heartwarming story will make you cry. When 28-year old singer-songwriter Mikey Delbond recently damaged his beloved Martin guitar…
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SAN FRANCISCO — Local Guitar Center sales associate Dan Shin deemed a customer’s routine purchase “pretty sick” earlier this week,…
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EUGENE, Ore. — Local mechanic and outspoken male feminist Elias Murphy finally received his copy of Forbes magazine’s “Most Powerful…
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Justin Cox
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Acclaimed ogre and Hollywood superstar Shrek is best known for the proliferation of nude photos containing his likeness on the…
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Dear Scabby: I hit a child driving home from work. This was 3 years ago. I haven't told anyone. What…
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Mark Roebuck
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TEMPE, Ariz. — Local punk Arnie Parker vowed to take the crown for the worst tattoos back from modern hip-hop…
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Kaitlyn Jeffers
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NEW YORK — Dating website OkCupid announced on Wednesday that they added a new filter, enabling users to search for…
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