Goodrich Gevaart
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October 12, 2021
LIMA, Ohio — A large, unattended assortment of pumpkins located in front of Lima Bethelem Church are apparently free for…
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Jus Kaplan
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October 11, 2021
Almost every Millennial was forced to read Lois Lowry’s “The Giver” at some point during middle school. We were quizzed…
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Peter Woods
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October 11, 2021
HOPKINGTON, Mass. — Local creep Brad Hinton announced his plans to run a full marathon, moments after seeing a woman…
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Ryan Danley
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October 11, 2021
SEATTLE — A local property management company announced they will begin offering fully furnished punk houses which will include a…
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Caroline Smith
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October 10, 2021
BALTIMORE — Friends of local mom-to-be Vivian Wilburg have been taking advantage of her mandatory sobriety and using her as…
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Caroline Smith
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October 10, 2021
HENDERSON, Nev. — Local goth Amarantha Obsidian blew her entire October grocery budget on novelty Halloween socks from Spirit Halloween…
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Ryan Danley
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October 9, 2021
SEAGRAVES, Texas — Local machete-wielding family of murderous butchers, the Fletchers, are rallying against Hollywood’s constant belittling of their macabre…
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Camden Brazile
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October 9, 2021
PITTSBURGH — A local bouncer at the popular nightclub Shotbar manned his post last night with the adamant mindset to…
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Collin Canning
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October 9, 2021
BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — A tiny, free public library at the foot of a residential driveway was forced to ban an…
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Nathan Kamal
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October 8, 2021
COLTS NECK TOWNSHIP, N.J. — Legendary musician Bruce Springsteen recently admitted that he made up the “American working class” during…
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