Matt McInerney
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September 3, 2022
SEATTLE – Members of the seminal and often troubled emo band Grass Is Greener are reportedly getting back together after…
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Wilson Conkwright
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September 3, 2022
LOS ANGELES — Self-proclaimed singer-songwriter Otto LaMont stated he was done pursuing his secondary dreams of being a musician and…
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Robert John Scucci
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September 2, 2022
BALTIMORE — Local man Clyde Harris showed great restraint when he gently and thoughtfully relocated the Line 6 Spider that…
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Patrick Coyne
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September 2, 2022
HENNEPIN COUNTY, Minn. — The largely unsupervised Peanuts gang has finally called Child Protective Services on the parents of their…
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Bobby Korec
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September 2, 2022
LOS ANGELES — Local mother Donna Haim urged the three members of her daughters’ band HAIM to take their little…
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Krissy Howard
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September 1, 2022
BURLINGTON, Vt. — Local white woman Donna Phelps helpfully reminded her biracial friend Mariah Dominguez that they are, in fact,…
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Harry Valentine
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August 31, 2022
ATLANTA — Local time management specialist Troy Washington played a podcast while he caught up on an entirely different podcast,…
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Tom Peters
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August 30, 2022
SUNNYSIDE, N.Y. — 37-year-old former punk Colson Rankford reportedly retired his favorite medium-sized band T-shirt citing newfound maturity and downplaying…
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John Danek
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August 30, 2022
SAN DIMAS, Calif. — Local delusional man Scott Marin thinks you and he still have a friendship despite you dumping…
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Bobby Korec
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August 29, 2022
AUSTIN, Texas — America’s premier far-right conspiracy theorist Alex Jones alleged that the Sandy Hook defamation trial, for which he…
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