Most people would agree that the last place you want to die is on the job, not only because you’ll never enjoy retirement, but also because there’s a high probability your position will be posted within 24 hours of your demise. Plus, it’s not exactly a happy place.
Such was the case of Kevin Hernandez, a long-time Target employee who died in the stockroom last weekend. However, his supervisor, Declan Pierce, managed to steer his store clear of any mourning period whatsoever after informing employees that Bob had suddenly decided to transfer to a nice store upstate.
When Declan found the store’s longest tenured team member dead from a heart attack while trying to lift an 85” TV by himself, he sprang into action to ensure he’d be punched out for his break. After having the body discreetly taken out of the receiving bay doors by the paramedics, time was running out as to how he’d explain to his coworkers that the beloved team member and lover of pizza parties was no more.
“It would’ve broken our employees’ hearts to tell them Kevin passed away, and it would’ve especially broken our drive-up order metrics. So for the sake of everyone’s emotional wellbeing and to ensure the whole store wouldn’t try to put in PTO for his funeral, we told him he transferred to a wonderful Target upstate where he actually gets his hours, isn’t scheduled outside of his ability, and eats all the Pizza Hut cafe he wants,” said Pierce. “I’m not saying that our employees aren’t emotionally mature enough to process his death, it’s just that we were already understaffed and we’ll never work all these clothes onto the floor if everyone’s too busy grieving.”
Of course, informing the team of Kevin’s permanent transfer was not without some hiccups, particularly when some of his former coworkers excitedly asked if they could transfer there too, or when they all saw his wife barge into the store, threatening to sue corporate. But it did seem like everyone bought the line about Kevin now running around a huge break room that always has a breakfast bar with his new redshirted friends.
“It wasn’t a perfect explanation, but at least they think he’s in a better place. I just hope everyone will be too overwhelmed with Black Friday sales to question why he isn’t visiting the store for the holidays.”