Woman Receives Yet Another Unsolicited Fish Pic on Tinder
RACINE, Wisc. — Local woman Madison Kemper nearly reached her breaking point with Tinder last night after receiving yet another…
Read More →
Ben Friedman — Page 34
350 stories found
Marjorie Taylor Greene Breaks Ground on Holocaust Denial Museum
WASHINGTON — GOP official and QAnon superstar Marjorie Taylor Greene announced she will be breaking ground on a museum dedicated…
Read More →
Concerned Punk Dad Finds Regular Sports Illustrated Under Son’s Mattress
OAKLAND, Calif. — Local punk dad Tim “Trashcan” McCarthy was shocked and disturbed yesterday after discovering a regular issue of…
Read More →
New Tribute Album Asks the Question: What if These Great Songs Sounded Bad?
LOS ANGELES — A forthcoming David Bowie tribute album is daring to ask the question: what if these universally revered…
Read More →
The Next Frank Black? This Bald Guy Is Shouting Nonsense
With the deluge of “suggested” bands thrown at us through music app algorithms, it seems like it’s become harder and…
Read More →
Robert Smith Leaves Flaming Bag of Fried Chicken on Morrissey’s Porch Again
LONDON — The Cure founder and noted prankster Robert Smith left another flaming bag of fried chicken on Morrissey’s doorstep…
Read More →
BMW to Implement Turn Signals in All Vehicles by 2022
MUNICH — Luxury car manufacturer BMW will finally implement turn signals in all of their vehicles by 2022, according to…
Read More →
Dog Can’t Believe They Allow Kids in This Brewery
MINNEAPOLIS — Local good boy Valentino was disgusted and appalled last week after an afternoon at his favorite brewery was…
Read More →
Divorcing Couple Agrees to Joint Custody of Raymond
RIDGEWOOD, N.J. — After hours of mediation, divorcing couple David and Sophie Keller have finally found middle ground as they…
Read More →
Secret Police Charged Extra $50 for Returning Rental Vans Bloody
CHICAGO — An Avis car rental in Lincoln Park is trying to send the federal government a $50 cleaning bill…
Read More →