LOS ANGELES — Startling new models released today predict a massive spike in potential lovers subjecting their first dates to…
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PITTSFORD, Vt. — 28-year-old Alex Solorzano is now in his seventh week of blaming social distancing for his sexual inactivity,…
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DENVER — Local anomaly and known dirtbag David Gunther has perplexed a team of scientists with his disgust at the…
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BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Entrepreneur and stay-at-home roommate Eunice Gibbs begrudgingly washed the dishes this morning left from her dinner last…
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SAN DIEGO — Daisey McKinley’s period asked her eyes and heart again this morning if they know when her white…
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Always believe the victim. That’s a principle I live by when it comes to the victims of stolen intellectual property,…
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BURLINGTON, Vt. — Local woman Gina Crossman is eager to “set the record straight” since gaining the reputation of being…
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BROOKLYN, N.Y — Polyamorous partners Holly Byrne and Amanda Bartlow pledged their never-ending commitment to one another, and to giving…
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WASHINGTON — U.S. Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos became the first woman to irreparably damage the infrastructure at Woodrow Wilson…
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SPRINGFIELD, Ill. — Katelyn Paskin suffered a minor concussion earlier today after losing consciousness in a severe asthma attack, despite…
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