I knew going into the office kitchenette was a mistake. I foolishly exchanged pleasantries with someone from accounting, I think his name is Harold but I really don’t know. Then I did something I will regret for the rest of my life, I asked how he’s getting on. Boy am I finding out.
Things aren’t going well at home apparently. Trouble with the wife. Kids don’t like him. Like I give a fuck. I only came in here to warm up my lunch, but he really seems to have latched onto me as some kind of moral support lifebuoy. He was supposed to say something like “Living the dream” or “Counting down the seconds until the weekend.” I’d politely laugh and then we could both move on, but no.
Don’t get me wrong. Mental health is super important, and I think it’s vital to have people in our lives we can be open and vulnerable with, I really do. It just shouldn’t be with me, especially at work. I wouldn’t mind so much if he occasionally asked for my opinion, or even stopped talking long enough for me to share it, but this is one-way traffic. He could be talking to the microwave for all the difference it’d make to the flow of conversation.
Honestly, it’s kind of impressive how determined he’s been to ignore the social cues that I’d like to wrap up the exchange and be alone with last night’s meatloaf. I keep saying “Well…” super loud and standing up out of my chair, but he persists and angles his body to block the door. I pretended to take an “emergency” phone call from my doctor and he just started talking louder. Nobody else has come into the room for at least five minutes now. They know what’s going on, the bastards.
To add insult to injury the guy started crying a couple of minutes ago. Not gently either. Like, really letting it out, shoulders shaking, pounding the counter with his fist, the whole shebang. Am I really the one who should be hearing all this? Surely the couples counselling he said he’s started going to should be a better outlet than a captive audience at work.
He says it’s great having someone to talk to at work, and he’s always considered me his best friend. Honestly, at this point I’m scared about what he might do if I cut this conversation off. By god if he asks me how I’m doing at the end of this I’ll tell him everything. Every last thing. Someone should hear it.
That’s what best friends are for right?