James Knapp
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January 2, 2021
LEMOYNE, Penn. — Roommate and all-around jackass Glen Sullivan reportedly drank the last beer in the house moments after having…
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Patrick Crooks
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January 2, 2021
Whether you’re my mom’s ex-boyfriend or the guy my mom is currently sort of seeing Led Zeppelin has had an…
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John Danek
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January 2, 2021
FREDERICK, Md. — Longtime punk band Booger Eater realized yesterday that it’s been over 10 months since they occupied a…
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Doug Francisco
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January 1, 2021
AMIGARA — In a press conference today, Boring Company founder Elon Musk unveiled the latest redesign of his Hyperloop transportation…
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Jimmy Adamson
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January 1, 2021
If you are reading this right now and your name is Yolanda Saldívar… FUCK. YOU. You literally MURDERED beloved singer/songwriter/spokesperson/businesswoman/…
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Ryan Danley
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January 1, 2021
LOS ANGELES — Local fuckup Jerry Millwater’s 2021 New Year’s resolution of “practice more self-care” is concerned about its upcoming…
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Kevin Tit
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January 1, 2021
There’s a reason Machine Gun Kelly’s album "Tickets To My Downfall" debuted as number one on the Billboard charts. And,…
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Michael De Toffoli
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January 1, 2021
CALABASAS, Calif. — 73-year-old Wagnerian rock legend Michael “Meat Loaf” Aday was appalled to learn yesterday that Millennials have accepted…
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