WASHINGTON — President Trump announced the creation of the new Federal Institute for Regulating Ethnonormality (FIRE) agency that would complement ICE by importing white foreigners…
Just when you thought international relations couldn’t get any sweeter, we’ve got a story of one long-term pals really showing up for another—the US and…
WASHINGTON — Vice President J.D. Vance suddenly woke up from a recurring nightmare in which a minimum wage employee wasn’t in extreme medical debt due…
BEDFORD, N.Y. — Matchbox Twenty lead singer and primary songwriter Rob Thomas announced that the United States of America, a divided nation caught in a…
BEND, Ore. — Local amateur historian and occasional beloved family member Paul Poppavich vehemently dismisses news of fascism’s rising international tide, despite an encyclopedic knowledge…
Are you supportive of the current path the United States is on? Do you despise the way the country is being run and feel like…
MENLO PARK, Calif — Facebook parent company Meta launched what it describes as its “most powerful Facebook profile picture filter yet” in a bid to…
WASHINGTON — President Biden revealed that the United States reached a new milestone in global dominance and is just one military base on foreign soil…
Every state thinks they have the best metal band around. They also think your state has the worst metal band ever. Are you gonna let…
WINNIPEG, Manitoba — Canadian classic rock band Bachman-Turner Overdrive announced around the crack of noon that they will not be taking care of any business…
PHILADELPHIA — All shows featuring tough guy hardcore bands are now on indefinite hiatus as musicians within the genre prepare to head back to Afghanistan,…
Never let the government tell you what you can and cannot do. That’s what punk rock is for. In fact, I learned everything I know…
OMAHA, Neb. — Citizens across the country are coping with record breaking heat and wondering why there has been seemingly zero warning of rising temperatures…
WASHINGTON — United States Capitol building ghost, Josiah H. Hubbard, confirmed that he feels a cold chill through his very being every time Kentucky Senator…
Enough is enough! The American government is at a standstill. Our own seat of political power is hopelessly compromised all due to the misuse of…