John Danek
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COLUMBIA, Md. – Non-confrontational wuss Samuel Bleck took out decades of built-up frustration today by open-palm slapping drywall in his…
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James Knapp
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GREAT BARRINGTON, Mass. — Smashing Pumpkins frontman Billy Corgan stood up to speak last night at an assembly about the…
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Shea Strauss
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KIRBY, Wyo. — Local woman Madison Fuller announced today via multiple social media platforms that she is expecting to be…
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Freelancer
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HOMER, Ala. — The emotional affair between English teacher Lara Palledorous and her co-worker Allessandro Reyes resulted in a sweaty,…
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Alan Khanukaev
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LIVONIA, Mich. — A group of punk Christmas carolers regretted their choice to include The Misfits’ classic “Last Caress” in…
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John Dixon
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ST. LOUIS — Acquaintances of chronically fatigued punk Anthony Mafodda are reportedly perplexed by the rocker’s nocturnal habit of sheathing…
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Kyle Sekaquaptewa
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LOS ANGELES — Local woman Shelby Walsh announced yesterday that she’s “turned over a new leaf,” rebranding her tumultuous personal…
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Jon Wood
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VACAVILLE, Calif. — Local Papa Roach fan Danny Herman scurried out of a Circle K this morning in apparent good…
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Shea Strauss
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DALLAS — Singer-songwriter and registered sex offender Wilfred Barton announcded his first tour dates at a press conference held yesterday…
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Patrick Coyne
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NORMAN, Okla. — A surprising new study found that it’s way easier to just change your password every time you…
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