We’ve all heard the adage that one should “live every day like it’s their last,” but what does it really mean? I’ll tell you. It…
LOS ANGELES – GLAAD, the world’s largest LGBTQ media advocacy organization, announced that local boyfriend Noah Simms will receive a Vanguard Award for his work…
In the words of Steve Miller and his band, time keeps on slipping into the future. Do you want to feel old? Well, guess what?…
AUSTIN, Texas — Hardcore band Mindforce appeared on the Joe Rogan Experience podcast after they were mistaken for a brain-boosting supplement, according to confused, kettlebell-curling…
NEW YORK — Pitchfork surprised readers when it awarded a rare perfect 10 score to “Humpback!,” a $28 ambient whale noise CD produced by Hallmark,…
VANCOUVER, Wash. – Local office worker and self-proclaimed feminist Bryce Coquet loudly reprimanded a female coworker for having the audacity to mention that she had…
“King of the Hill” is the greatest animated sitcom not invented by Matt Groening, and even when we take that little show into consideration, it’s…
Meet Kevin Buchanan, a self-identifying feminist ally who also holds the record for the most hours that someone has ever spent watching Tik Toks of…
SAN JOSE, Calif. — Local man Seth Beaudreault achieved the longest health kick of any American trying to eat better, breaking the world record with…
CANCÚN, Mexico — Junior Texas Senator Ted Cruz used a small portion of his Frequent Fleeing Texas Storm Miles reward points to upgrade from business…
NEW YORK — Local 36-year-old loser Ryan Buttermyer reportedly maintained a heroic ten-minute wait period before confirming he’d be at a party, despite having absolutely…
Hand to god, this thing was a steal. At least I thought it was. 2001 Pontiac Aztek GT. 40k miles. One owner. Spotless Carfax report.…
SWEETHAVEN VILLAGE — Mosh pitters of a recent Harbored Frustrations show were apprehensive when they noticed Popeye in the pit within grabbing distance of a…
Napalm Death are an influential British grindcore band formed in 1981. Early on, their lineup had some, uh, stability issues, but their most well-known and…
BOSTON — Players, coaches, and administrators for the Boston Celtics celebrated their record-breaking 18th title and claimed the victory was revenge for the city of…