WINDSOR, Conn — Local terrible cousin Terry Reynolds made everyone uncomfortable at his family’s annual Memorial Day BBQ by loudly…
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Jordan Liffengren
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WASHINGTON — Famed Harry Potter villain Lord Voldemort was spotted at Donald Trump’s Presidential Inauguration, hiding under First Lady Melania…
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Ian Steffé
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It’s alarming. Your friend took a trip to Santa Fe after a grisly break up and the first thing you…
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Robert John Scucci
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BALTIMORE — Local bachelor Dennis Howell has been wearing the same hat for the entirety of his adult life because…
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Chris Bowen
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WASHINGTON — The Smithsonian Institute presented guitar icon Slash with the rare opportunity of performing while wearing the exact top…
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Nathan Kamal
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The Viper Club. "Slippery When Wet." Drinking way too much shitty vodka in a pool. These are all potent symbols…
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John Dixon
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QUINCY, Mass. — Local 30-year-old Danny Sullivan went under the knife this morning for a dangerous operation to remove the…
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Alexandra Houle
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TORONTO — Local well-known-for-having-a-beard guy Will Hoover has finally invested in a hat after being asked to shave for a…
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WHITMAN, Mass. — Local punk Bobby Deitz was disappointed last Friday by the Hardcore Sorting Hat, which placed him into…
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Tom Peters
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GREENSBORO, N.C. — UNCG sophomore Dylan Godsin, already known to many on campus as “hat guy,” made a major play…
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