EL SOBRANTE, Calif. — Founding Primus member Les Claypool finally reached a level of competence that will allow him to stop playing bass and switch…
CHANDLER, Ariz. — Gina Feldspar, bassist for punk band Piss Ritual, performed a periodic inventory of “good” and “bad” teeth by using her tongue to…
COEUR D’ALENE, Idaho — Grammatically correct person and all-around fucking showoff Eric Cyr responded that he’s doing “well” today after you’d already stated that you’re…
MINNEAPOLIS — Law enforcement officials have renamed the interrogation tactic “Good Cop, Bad Cop” to “Accomplice Cop, Murderer Cop” to more accurately reflect the reality…
BALTIMORE — Members of local band Wasted Rat agreed yesterday that the guitar solo in their new song “absolutely rips,” but immediately turned to arguing…
LOS ANGELES — Local punk Noah Slafer scoured the internet last night to find out whether he should view Julian Assange as a right-wing puppet…
PITTSBURGH — Fans watching local math rock guitarist Steve Sanchez’s performance last night were split on whether the musician is a “once-in-a-lifetime talent” or “complete…
ROCHESTER, N.Y. — Local roleplaying enthusiast Susan Warburton, confirmed to be “true neutral” on the alignment chart by close friends and family, considers herself to…
DENVER — Local Oi! band Treadhead took every opportunity between songs to remind the crowd that they “are not a racist band,” with the songs…